Tools for Setting and Reaching Goals

Goal Setting: Resolutions, Traction and Progress Planner

I’m doing a something a little different this year for my resolutions/goals. Last year, my husband, girls and I, wrote out our resolutions on big sheets of paper using a vision mapping method I’d seen online (Blog post here). I reviewed the 2017 goals over the weekend and actually did a pretty good job of accomplishing the majority of them.

But this year, I want to go even bigger.

Here are the tools I’m using for setting and reaching my short-term and long-term goals:

  1. Progress Planner: I did some research on planners and finally chose this one based on the price ($19.99 vs. some of the planners that were $50+), reviews and format. It isn’t based on a calendar-year but instead based on two, 90-day periods. Also, the main focus isn’t day-to-day calendar items, but what I need to do daily to accomlish one major goal in 90 days. Find it here on Amazon. I started using the Progress Planner on January 1. So far: liking it. I like the layout, instructions, and daily accountability. Image result for progress planner
  2. Traction: Several months ago I read Traction by Gino Wickman. One of my clients is implementing the Entrepreneurial Operating System outlined in the book. I’ve enjoyed watching their progress and seeing the success of the operating system. The website for EOS has free tools you can download. For my long-term and short-term goals, I used the EOS Vision/Traction Organizer (V/TO). While this tool is mainly for business, I used it to focus on my personal Core Values, 10-Year Target, and 3-Year Picture. Traction/EOS works in 90-day time-frames, so fits perfectly with my Progress Planner. To determine my personal 10-Year Vision, I asked myself the following questions:
    • If I inherited $100 million today, what would I do with the rest of my life? What would I spend my time doing? How would I spend my days if money wasn’t an option?
    • If I found out I had one month left to live, how would I spend the next 30 days? What would be the most important things I’d want to accomplish?
    • What is my “Big Hairy Audacious Goal” (BHAG)? Taken from the book Built to Last by Jim Collins and Jerry Porras, this is again more of a business concept, but can be used for personal life as well. The idea is to come up with a big, bold long-term goal that is action-oriented and excites me.
  1. CliftonStrengths Assessment or Gallup StrengthsFinder: I’ve taken my assessment before, but I pulled out the binder of my strengths and reviewed what I should be doing to optimize my strengths. If you haven’t taken your assessment, I recommend it. More info here. Also, if it is in your budget to hire a Strength Coach, I also recommend. I used a coach previously and it was very beneficial in helping me understand my strengths and how to use them to the best of my ability.

Armed with these tools, I headed to the coffee shop on New Year’s Eve afternoon for a three-hour planning session. Taking this time was important to get away from distractions and dream, pray, conceptualize, reflect, and let my imagination take charge.

One important step in the “Progress Planner” system is to set a 90-day goal and to tell others about it for accountability. My goal is focused on my blog: To write 28 meaningful blog posts in 90 days, mainly focused on what I’m learning in the Bible or how I’m learning to spend more time with Jesus. 

Over the next 90 days, I’ll keep you updated on my progress and how the “Progress Planner” journal is working. I’ll also keep you updated on how I’m doing on my goal of 28 meaningful posts by March 31. Feel free to keep me accountable and also share any goal-keeping tools you have found useful.

Thanks for reading and for your feedback!

What Matters Most

As Jesus and the disciples continued on their way to Jerusalem, they came to a certain village where a woman named Martha welcomed him into her home. Her sister, Mary, sat at the Lord’s feet, listening to what he taught. But Martha was distracted by the big dinner she was preparing. She came to Jesus and said, “Lord, doesn’t it seem unfair to you that my sister just sits here while I do all the work? Tell her to come and help me.”

But the Lord said to her,“My dear Martha, you are worried and upset over all these details! There is only one thing worth being concerned about. Mary has discovered it, and it will not be taken away from her.” Luke 10:38-42

#DailyBibleReading #BibleReadingPlan

There is only one thing worth being concerned about: knowing and loving Jesus

That doesn’t mean I shouldn’t work hard and do my best in other areas of life – I should. But my #1 priority should be spending time with Jesus and getting to know Him better. Falling in love with Jesus. If I’m not spending time with him every day I need to re-prioritize.

This lesson took me 39 years to figure out.

Up until a few years ago, I’d try to read the Bible regularly, but I’d lose momentum or get distracted. I’d do Bible studies and try different devotional books, but I’d lose interest. My time reading the Bible and praying was very inconsistent. I was swamped with work and marriage and parenting . . . and Jesus got my leftover time and energy.

Then a perfect storm of things happened:

  1. My work-life had become unmanageable. I was working 60+ hours a week, traveling all the time and completely stressed out.
  2. I read the book The Divine Mentor and it was like a lightbulb went off: devotional books are fine, but the most important book – really the only book I need – is the Bible.
  3. I applied “S.O.A.P.” while reading the Bible. I don’t do it by the book, but I keep a journal with me and write done what I am learning in the Bible. This helps keep me focused and on track.
  4. My small group at church discussed the idea of reading through the Bible in a Year.

This perfect storm led to a breakthrough for me. I put my devotionals away. I opened my Bible. I signed up for a “Read through the Bible” in a year plan on Bible.com (I use the corresponding YouVersion app). I started going to bed earlier so I could get up an hour earlier and have an hour of peace and quiet to spend with Jesus before my family woke up. Eventually, I let all my clients go and made some major career changes.

The change has been amazing.

I’m far from perfect and realize I never will be on this earth, but Jesus is changing me. I still get stressed. I still lose it and yell at my kids (I did this morning when my daughter refused to get ready for school). But I don’t get nearly as stressed as I used to. I don’t get as angry as often. I feel peace. I feel love. I’m a better mom and wife. I know that God is in control. And I know that the time I invest in my relationship with Jesus is the most important investment I’ll ever make and it can never be taken from me.

Slowly but surely, by the grace of God, I’m being more like Mary.

 

 

Gomer and the King, Part 1

Once upon a time, there was a kingdom called Tranquility. While it was a small country, it was beautiful, with the ocean on one side and mountains, plains, deserts, and fertile rolling hills, all within its borders.

The ocean border had long, sandy white beaches and sandstone cliffs. Children would run along the beach and splash in the crystal blue water. Early in the morning, fishermen would leave in sturdy wooden boats and would return before dusk with nets full of shrimp, tuna, cod, mackerel, sea bass and even the occasional lobster.

Tranquility bustled with commerce, education, and the arts. In the hills, sheep roamed through green pastures and shepherds led them up well-worn paths to bubbling streams or freshwater lakes.  In the plains, there were fields of wheat and corn. The lush landscape included avocados, grapes, citrus, and, mangos.

Tranquility was a land of peace.

The king was named Azam. He was a good king – he was wise, merciful, and loving. He listened to the people of Tranquility. Unlike other rulers, he wasn’t greedy or dishonest. The people of Tranquility loved and respected him.

Azam was also very powerful. All the surrounding nations deferred to him and respected him. Enemy countries didn’t dare to invade or threaten Tranquility because they knew that Azam was a masterful warrior. The leaders of allied nations often visited Tranquility, bringing gifts, and asking Azam for advice.

Azam had been a widow for 18 years. His wife of one year had died during childbirth. The people of Tranquility gathered around the palace courtyard and Azam had come out to share the tragic news and presented to them the prince of Tranquility, a baby boy wrapped in blankets. Azam named his son Aristide.

Aristide took after his father. He was wise and powerful. He was also kind and good. He loved the people of Tranquility and they love him.

*****

Gomer had been beautiful when she was young. But circumstances, time, and bad decisions had worn her down. As a child people would see Gomer and her mother, Diblaim, in the market and comment that she was the most beautiful child they had ever seen. She had had light olive skin and green eyes. Her mother adored her and spoiled her.

While overall life was good in Tranquility, Gomer’s childhood had been rough. Her father drank too much wine. He’d start at the dinner table and at first, would be loud and funny, but eventually, he’d get mean. Loud and mean. He’d throw dishes at Diblaim. He’d yell at Gomer. He’d call both worthless and ugly.

Eventually, he left. But the damage was already done. Diblaim and Gomer both believed they were worthless and ugly. Diblaim tried to be a good mother and to convince Gomer that she wasn’t worthless. But eventually, overcome by her own pain, Diblaim gave up. Instead of taking the time and energy to show Gomer love, her mother just let her run wild . . . hoping that Gomer would heal herself.

Things didn’t get better. They got worse. Gomer was a wild child. By the time she was sixteen she was living on the streets or spending the night from house to house. While still beautiful, her skin was already turning sallow. Her green eyes no longer sparkled.

*****

Sunlight came through the open window. It was warm and bright on Gomer’s face. She groaned and turned away, burying her face into the silk sheets. An unfamiliar smell filled her nostrils and jarred her awake. It wasn’t a bad smell, but it wasn’t the smell of her home. She was in a stranger’s home. Again.

Gomer laid back into the bed and closed her eyes, trying to remember the night before. Instead, her mind wandered to her mother, Diblaim, miles away in their home in a mountain village, only a few miles from the border of Tranquility and Assran. Her mother used lavender to wash their sheets. As a child, Gomer would wake up to the faint scents of lavender, coffee, and vegetation.

Now she could smell musk, mangos, and salt water. Her feet hurt. She could tell she’d been running on the sand the night before. Her temples ached. She could tell she’d had too much wine.

But she still couldn’t remember whose house she was at or whose bed she was in.

Gomer gathered her dress off the floor, pulled the fabric over her shoulders, and snuck out through the open window.

*****

Gomer found her best friend, Adaliah, in the market. Though it was still early, the market was already crowded and loud. Women were setting up booths, laying out eggs and olives and brightly colored fabrics. Children were running through the booths, laughing and chasing each other until their mothers shooed them away and sent them to the beach to play.

Adaliah’s mother, Mary, sold jewelry. While it wasn’t made from gold or diamonds, it was still beautiful. On the table, there were rings and necklaces made of bronze, glass, stone and even wood. Sometimes Gomer would help Adaliah and her mother carve intricate designs into the wood; pictures of doves, ravens, and lions.

While Adaliah’s mother tolerated Gomer – and appreciated her help with the jewelry – she worried about her being a bad influence on Adaliah. Gomer had a reputation for partying too much and drinking too much. Sometimes she spent the night at their house. But Mary had no idea where Gomer slept when she wasn’t on Adaliah’s floor.

Mary and Adaliah were unloading crates of jewelry when Gomer arrived at the table. While acting like she was inspecting a necklace, Mary observed the girls. Adaliah was pretty and still naive, her curly brown hair bouncing on her shoulders. She was short in comparison to Gomer. Gomer was tall and allusive, with long dark hair glistening down her back. Her face was beautiful, but she carried pain in her green eyes. There was already a hardness in her, even though she was only 17-years-old. Mary worried what would become of her in the future. And she worried about what would become of Adaliah if she spent too much time with Gomer.

As Mary and the girls set out the last pieces of jewelry and pushed the crates under the table, they hear a crowd down the street. It was loud and getting closer. They could hear people talking about King Azam and the palace.

“What’s going on?” Mary called to a woman who sold dates and pomegranates a few booths away.

“I don’t know for sure, but it sounds like something terrible happened at the palace. King Azam is going to be making an announcement soon,” the woman said while hoisting a basket of figs onto her head. “I’m going to have my son watch my table so I can go to the palace to hear the King.”

Mary felt a pang in her stomach. Even though King Azam was young – he was only 24 – he was a great king. He loved the people of Tranquility. He was merciful and powerful and kind. A rare combination to find in anyone, let alone a king.

Adaliah looked at her mother with pleading eyes. Mary could see that Gomer had already taken off toward the palace, her long hair blowing in the wind. Mary sighed, “Go ahead, Adaliah, but come right back to tell me what he says.”

Adaliah ran to catch up with Gomer and when the girls arrived there was already a crowd surrounding the palace. The palace was on a hill, overlooking the ocean. Far behind it was the outline of the mountains. And somewhere in the mountains was a small village of shepherds and a cottage where Diblaim was probably cooking or cleaning.

While most of the crowd gathered around the palace looked worried, Gomer and Adaliah squeezed through the crowd in excited anticipation to see the king. They pushed past children and old men and anxious women to get to the front of the crowd.

Suddenly the palace doors opened and a hush fell over the crowd.

King Azam walked into the courtyard. He was tall and handsome. But his pain was obvious. In his arms was a small bundle of blankets.

“My people of Tranquility, I love you all” he began, “And it is with great sorrow that I need to inform you that your queen has died.” The crowd gasped and people began to whisper in shock. The soldiers standing near the king signaled for everyone to be quiet, as King Azam raised the bundle of blankets into the air.

“I present to you, my son, Prince Aristide, whom I love,” said King Azam, his voice cracking.

Gomer and Adaliah pressed forward to get closer to the king and prince. Soon there were only a few rows of people between them and the king. Gomer pushed her way forward until only a small group of children separated her and the king.

As King Azam walked by, Gomer peered into the blanket in his arms. The tiny infant was sleeping peacefully, wrapped in swaddling clothes. His little lips were slightly parted as he slept completely content in his father’s strong arms.

Gomer lifted her eyes from the sleeping infant to King Azam’s handsome face. She could see the tears in the king’s eyes. Their eyes met.

Gomer felt a spark like she’d never felt before.

*****